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“The emotion that can break your heart is sometimes the very one that heals it”-Nicholas Sparks #heal #heartbroken #relationships #emotion #mentalhealth #nicholassparks #love #intention #depression #forgiveness

Posted by on Nov 12, 2018 in Blog | 0 comments

So many emotions can break one’s heart from anger to jealousy to plain hurt and disappointment.  I think everyone experiences emotions that seem to break your heart open in terms of relationships whether they be with a friend, significant other or family.  Whatever those emotions are, they can provide an avenue to heal yourself.  We can’t change how others think or treat us, but we can control how much energy we let them have by being in our heads and controlling our emotions.  One of my pet peeves as a therapist is hearing “How does that make you feel?” (I’m cringing just typing it!).  When we use “make” we imply blame on someone else and I don’t know anyone who blames others and then feels better.  You are in control of what happens in your head.

Use those negative relationship emotions past or present to fuel your drive to give something to yourself this week instead of giving energy to someone else who has hurt you.  This can be saying something positive in your self-talk such as “I’m awesome!” or “I’m a great friend.”  Whatever it is, be kind to yourself and remember you are in control.  Believe it and refocus that energy on something positive for you because I bet that person that hurt you doesn’t deserve to be in your head!

“Quitting is better than coping because quitting frees you up to excel at something else”-Seth Godin #quitting #anxiety #depression #selfcare #choice #decisions #mentalhealth #awareness #possibility

Posted by on Nov 5, 2018 in Blog | 0 comments

In our culture, quitting usually has negative connotations.  There’s this idea that if you quit something, you are giving up, a failure, should feel guilty, etc.  What if we change this perspective so there’s a possibility that quitting could actually be a good thing?  For example, let’s say that every morning you want to get up 30 minutes earlier to exercise, however when your alarm goes off, the snooze button gets hit for the whole 30 minutes.  If you could quit hitting that snooze button and exercise, quitting could actually add something positive and accomplish one of your goals!

This can translate into so many things, such as coping with a job you hate, communicating people who bring you down, saying “yes” to things that don’t add value to your life.  The list can go on forever.  The challenge this week is to find 1 thing in your life that is not working for you…either you don’t feel good about it, it doesn’t add value or can be a waste of time.  Whatever it is, it is time to quit!  Quit and open yourself to the possibilities of positive change and feel good about it!  You got this!

“We make a living by what we get; we make a life by what we give”-Winston Churchill #trickortreat #giving #generosity #mindfulness #relationships #communication #kindness

Posted by on Oct 29, 2018 in Blog | 0 comments

I chose this quote for Halloween because each year I witness many children running around the neighborhood trying to get as much candy as possible, focusing on quantity and running from door to door often saying “trick or treat” as they run to the next house.  I think this is a great example for this quote as with our pace of life we are constantly running to the next thing without taking a moment to say “thank you” or allow a moment of conversation.  I personally love to tell kids how great their costumes are, ask what their favorite candy is and engage in the lost art form of conversation.

Last year, a little boy was with his older brothers trick or treating at my house.  While his older brothers sped away to the next house, the little boy about 5 years old dressed as Darth Vader asked me what my favorite candy was and when I told him it was Reese’s, he reached into his bag and gave me one!  I then gave him 2 large handfuls of candy because that was a rare form of generosity!  The challenge this week is to give something back, maybe it’s holding a door for someone, buying the person behind you a coffee, texting a friend a thoughtful message.  When I think of Halloween, I love thinking of that little boy, being brave to stay back from his brothers, taking the time to say thanks and giving up one of his candies despite being dressed as a villain.  I guess there can be candy on the dark side if you find the right person 🙂

“Celebrate what is right so u have energy for the wrong”-Mary Ann Wasil #MaryAnnWasil #positivity #choice #energy #selfcare #anxiety #mentalhealth #wellbeing #celebrate

Posted by on Oct 22, 2018 in Blog | 0 comments

I believe we as humans are poorly wired to see only the negative…at one point this probably served us well for survival, but in our modern world this certainly doesn’t bring sunshine to our crappy days.  We all have those days where we’re late, stuck behind a truck/bus, spill coffee on ourselves, hit every red light, our technology doesn’t work, our kids aren’t cooperating and the list goes on.  When those moments happen, it’s important to celebrate what is right this week, no matter how silly it sounds.

If you hit every red light this week celebrate that you car’s brakes work.  If you spill coffee on your favorite shirt, celebrate the spill itself because life is messy and you are surviving it! Whatever happens, find some light in the dark and remind yourself that you are awesome and will get through anything with your supreme awesomeness! With all that energy you are giving back to yourself, next time negativity comes in, you’ll be ready to work through it and get back to what is positive in your life, moving forward in being the best you for yourself and those around you.

“Sometimes it’s important to go to a familiar place and look at it with fresh eyes”-Marsha Cooper #marshacooper #perspective #mindfulness #selfcare #experience #mentalhealth #anxiety #awareness #motivation #nature #therapy

Posted by on Oct 15, 2018 in Blog | 0 comments

When we are rushed, feeling anxious, depressed or just plain off it can leave us feeling like we are surviving and not thriving.  Think of a place that you like to go to, maybe alone where you feel relaxed and calm.  If you can this week, I would encourage you to go to that place if you can and take a look at it with fresh eyes…what do you see? What do you smell? What feelings, thoughts and memories come up for you here?  Allow yourself to be in the moment and connect with those thoughts and feelings.  Having a fresh perspective can be a new fulfilling experience that gives you the momentum you need to get through the week.

If you can’t get to that place, try to take a moment to close your eyes and imagine it or look at a picture of it if you can.  You can do this exercise really with any place to get in touch with yourself and others in various settings and to learn to look at things differently.  For example,  if you sit down at your desk at work and immediately feel anxiety, that would probably be a good time to sit back and look at your desk as your own space…what would you need to see on your desk that could help bring your anxiety down? Maybe it’s a funny picture or one of those “easy” buttons from Staples…or perhaps thinking of something positive before you sit down.

Perspective can be a complete game changer with what we think and how we feel.  Embrace this exercise to discover a new way to see through any negativity in your life.

“In real life, I’ve found that progress lives in small and seemingly uneventful accomplishments”-Lauren Graham #meaning #laurengraham #progress #moments #mindfulness #awareness #mentalhealth #selfcare #goals #waves #accomplishment

Posted by on Oct 8, 2018 in Blog | 0 comments

Dreams and goals all seem like such wonderful things, until you realize what you have to do to reach them.  It’s like wanting to become a pop star and when you show up to audition for a reality singing show with 4000 people  and realize you are singing not in front of judges on tv, but some random person…it’s a downer for sure!  Real progress often comes in small steps, disguised with great meaning underneath.  Maybe you want to eat better and so you get the burger, but instead of fries you opt for a vegetable, that’s a small step, however if you did that 1 meal a day for a month you would start seeing some real progress.  It could be waking up just 10 minutes before everyone else in your house to have a moment to yourself, over time you will start to feel the benefit of not rushing into the survival mode of the day.

The mental health challenge this week is to look at the small accomplishments and understand the larger impact they have on your goals or just well-being throughout the week.  For example, if you pick out your clothes the night before, then the next morning maybe you aren’t scrambling as much to get out the door, which carries over to getting to work on time, allowing you to accomplish more, meet your deadlines and leave on time.

Create the waves that will travel to eventually meet your goals and create your dreams…1 small and uneventful step at a time. You got this!


“What’s more important is not what you do but what you decide not to do”-Michael Lazerow #motivation #decision #michaellazerow #boundaries #selfcare #mindfulness #choices #noguilt #permission

Posted by on Oct 1, 2018 in Blog | 0 comments

September often brings the start of many things…birthdays, festivals, holiday beginnings, back to school (parents, teachers and kids)…it’s a lot.  Calendars fill up fast with little time to engage in meaningful downtime.  Before you get tangled in holiday lights and adorn your fridge with invitations, take a step back.  Of all these things, what do you really want to do?  I bet not everything is speaking loudly and in fact some things you may feel like you “have to” go.  Well, today I’m giving you permission to say “no!” to something so that you can say “yes!” to you.  What activity can you forgo to give some time to yourself?  Even if you skip something in order to complete a task on your to do list, if it’s going to help you feel better, go for it!

Having an over-scheduled life leads to little time to reflect, process and learn from our experiences.  Sure, there are somethings that we need to do, however prioritizing and giving yourself permission to do 1 thing for yourself can leave you feeling refreshed and better able to complete the tasks ahead.  Use this week to decide what you want to do and what you are willing to let go of so you can be a better you and feel great about your decisions!

“Everything is messier than you expect it to be unless you expect it to get messy”-Sal Khan #motivation #goals #expectations #mentalhealth #selfcare #anxiety #messy #resilience #overcome #resources #support

Posted by on Sep 24, 2018 in Blog | 0 comments

Life is full of messes and that’s what I believe makes life special.  Think about it-if everything went perfectly all the time, life would become a bore.  If the shows we watched on TV never had conflict and had a happy ending every episode, it would be guaranteed to get cancelled.  The best shows have a cliff-hanger of conflict at the end to keep you motivated to watch it, reflect about what happened, what you think will happen and then you are anxiously waiting for the next episode to air.

In real life, we tend to set unrealistic expectations that things will happen without a hitch or that they will be full of catastrophes.  The challenge this week is not to expect a mess…that’s easy to do.  The challenge is to know and believe that if a mess happens, you will have the resources to fix it, change it, overcome it, work through it, ask for support, etc.  Messes in life can feel uncomfortable, disheartening or just plain annoying.  If we look at them as an opportunity to believe in ourselves that we will overcome, learn and move on- we will be better able to take whatever mess the universe decides to throw at us.  Bring it on universe, we are ready!

“Every day may not be good…but there’s something good in every day”-Anonymous #grateful #motivation #positive #selfcare #mentalhealth #goodday #perspective #selfawareness #mindfulness #reflection

Posted by on Sep 17, 2018 in Blog | 0 comments

Some days are good and some not so much.  When there’s negativity in our life, it usually outshines the positive and creates a cycle of irritability and pessimism.  It can seem like your world is spiraling out of control or that a dark cloud is hovering over you, but I’m here to tell you there is hope!  Perspective and reflection are key to finding the good in your day.

The Blogspiration challenge this week is to find something good in every day.  It may be as simple as that you showed up to work on time, telling someone you love them, eating healthy or being thankful for the health you have overall.  Whatever day you have, there is always something positive in there and when you focus on those things, the negative begins to fade.

P.S. Use this as a tool before you sleep at night, to reflect upon what was good about your day rather than worrying about the next.  Try not to anticipate the negative and instead, reflect on those positive moments!

“There is more in us than we know. If we can be made to see it, perhaps, for the rest of our lives, we will be unwilling to settle for less”-Kurt Hahn #dreams #habits #motivation #monday #mentalhealth #routines #smallsteps #selfcare

Posted by on Sep 10, 2018 in Blog | 0 comments

It’s easy to get stuck in our every day routines, yet we may find ourselves dreaming of doing something bigger, more challenging or fulfilling in our lives.  Then it’s easy to get stuck believing those dreams are unattainable and continue to not act towards them thinking our ideas may be silly and invaluable.  You are capable of being and doing more than you think!

The Blogspiration challenge this week is to not settle for your daily routine or unhealthy habits.  Make 1 change each day this week to add value to your life in a small, yet meaningful way.  I promise you that no matter how small, it can add significant value to motivating yourself making those dreams a reality.  This could be stopping yourself from eating the whole container of french fries by leaving 3-5 pieces behind.  It could be walking your dog one block further than usual, eating lunch someplace else besides your desk or putting away your cellphone when you are spending time with your kids.  Whatever it is, once it’s done, you know you are capable of more than you think, don’t settle for less!